Can You Talk Money with Your Spouse?
The topic of money is often an emotionally laden topic–one that we avoid. We all have our own money history and money story. Many of our beliefs come from our parents; others from friends or society. Some of us think as money as freedom; if we can spend what we want when we want, we are really free. Others think of money as security; something to be saved at all costs, worth sacrificing present happiness to ensure having in the future. When two people with differing money philosophies form a union, conflict can result.
Avoiding conversations about money can lead to misunderstanding, secrecy and financial infidelity. Having conversations about money can reveal much about the person with whom we intend to spend (pun intended) our lives with. So, when is a good time to talk about money and our philosophies about money?
Ideally, it’s best to know your intended’s philosophy before committing to a lifetime together. Engaging in premarital counseling, Collaborative Marriage Planning, or utilizing the Collaborative Law process for a pre-nuptial agreement are all ways people can have productive, informational discussions about money before marriage or commitment. If you are already married, have the conversation anyway. If at all possible, don’t wait until you are getting a divorce.
About the Author
Carolann Mazza
Florida Family Law Attorney (The Florida Bar, admitted 2001) · Florida Supreme Court Certified Family Mediator (certified 2011, No. 25475F) · Super Lawyers, Family Law, 2022–2026
Carolann Mazza is the founder of Carolann Mazza, P.A., a non-litigation family law firm she opened in Fort Lauderdale in 2003. Practicing family law in Florida since 2001 and admitted to the State Bar of Texas in 1997, she resolves divorce and family conflicts exclusively through Collaborative Divorce, mediation, and out-of-court settlement — keeping families out of court while preserving relationships, dignity, and children’s wellbeing. She serves Broward, Palm Beach, and Miami-Dade counties.