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There Is A Better Way!


Divorce affects every family and member of our society in some way or another. It particularly affects children. The statistics vary from 40 to 50% of first marriages ending in divorce; the stats for subsequent marriages are higher. The traditional litigated divorce inflames already highly emotional couples. Unresolved conflicts, fueled by miscommunication and unacknowledged powerful emotions, are the driving force behind high-conflict divorces and the high costs (both emotional and financial) that result.

Enter: Collaborative Divorce/Collaborative Law. We are a group of specially trained lawyers, mental health professionals and financial professionals that practice and promote collaborative practice for families facing divorce and other matters. The cornerstone of the approach is an agreement that the couple and the professionals sign that commits the couple to: 1) participate in good faith to reach an agreement that addresses both people’s interests and concerns; 2)


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Collaborative Divorce Keeps the Decisions in Your Hands


I read the following post on FB recently, written by a family law litigator:

“I am completely disappointed with the ruling received today from my trial last month in Palm Beach. I think it sends a disgusting message regarding time sharing with a 15 year old.”

If the attorney is disappointed, I wonder how the client feels. I wonder how the 15 year old feels, especially in light of the fact his parents couldn’t get it together enough to make decisions for him on their own. I wonder if the attorneys outlined the options this family had in addressing their family dispute to each of their clients, including staying out of court. I wonder how much the attorneys fueled the dispute the couple was having. I wonder how much disappointment, anger, and frustration could have been avoided if this couple had


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Collaborative Practice

Collaborative Practice, including Collaborative Law and interdisciplinary Collaborative Divorce, is a new way for you to resolve disputes respectfully — without going to court — while working with trained professionals who are important to all areas of your life. The term incorporates all of the models developed since IACP’s Minnesota lawyer Stu Webb created Collaborative Law ideas in the 1980s.

The heart of Collaborative Practice or Collaborative Divorce (also called “no-court divorce,” “divorce with dignity,” “peaceful divorce”) is to offer you and your spouse or partner the support, protection, and guidance of your own lawyers without going to court. Additionally, Collaborative Divorce allows you the benefit of child and financial specialists, divorce coaches and other professionals all working together on your team.

In Collaborative Practice, core elements form your contractual commitments, which are to:

• Negotiate a mutually acceptable settlement without having courts decide issues.


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What is Your Divorce Lawyer Not Telling You?


If your divorce lawyer is directing you to a traditional, litigated divorce instead of a collaborative divorce, listen to what she is not telling you.  For example, she is not telling you that the court system is completely unequipped to deal with the underlying emotions inherent in every divorce and that left unattended and unacknowledged, those emotions fester and cause continued conflict post-judgment.  The Collaborative Divorce process is designed to address and acknowledge the emotions inherent in every divorce, allowing you to get past the emotions and move on with your life.


She is not telling you that traditional, litigated divorce takes all the control out of your hands and puts it into the hands of strangers:  judges, lawyers, guardians-ad litem, etc.  If you value self-determination and autonomy and want to decide what your post-divorce family will look like and


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Helpful and Informative Books

Books About How to Divorce:


   Sam Margulies                                   Constance R. Ahrons                                         Stuart Levine


Books for Divorcing Parents:

book1                book2               book5

Beverly Cleary                                Vicki Lansky                             Melinda Blau


Books for Kids Going Through Divorce:

book11               book3                    book4                   
Gayle Kimball                                Paula Danziger                            Janet Sinberg 


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